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November 29, 2003
Daniel
Took a few minutes to cruise other blogs. Just wasting time when I should be writing my final paper. The usual procrastination. Ran into some 9/11 stuff. Jogged back some memories. I've survived my life from a very early age with various protective mechanisms: numbing, filing, compartmentalizing, deep shafting, whatever works. As an adult, numbing is the easiest. I just don't feel mine or anyone else's pain. I just do what needs to be done. At work. At home. Where ever. What ever. One foot in front of another. Push ahead. Push along.
When I least expect it someone or something just punches through my skin. I'll walk into a patient's room and look and him or her and there will be a connection, a bond and I'll feel and I'll care more than usual. The hole from Daniel Pearl's death has never closed. He will pop into my head unexpectedly and I will feel the loss of someone I never knew. The loss of something beautiful and precious that needed to be here for as long as possible.
Posted by swift at November 29, 2003 10:23 AM