Would You Like Fry With That?
I’d just been cast as the lead in the musical version of Stephen Fry’s film, Bright Young Things, on the London stage. I was quite excited, mainly because I’d always admired Mr. Fry’s work and was looking forward to getting to know him personally.
Unfortunately, the whole time we were rehearsing he ignored everyone completely, preferring to spend his time glued to a brand new version of the Konami Dance Dance Revolution arcade game that he’d had installed backstage.
This new version of Dance Dance Revolution not only had the basic platform with the four arrows, it also had various musical instruments and noisemakers mounted around the handrail. So, not only did you have to do all of the fancy footwork, you also had to keep your eye on the screen and blow the bicycle horn, play the concertina, or crash the cymbals, etc., when required.
Mr. Fry was really quite good, but he had a habit of flailing his arms about as he danced, so you couldn’t even approach him to ask a question without the risk of losing an eye.
After two weeks of rehearsal I couldn’t stand it any longer, so I screwed up my courage, approached Mr. Fry as he was right in the middle of a stunning performance of “Dynamite Rave SSR,” and was going to say (over the thrum of the machine), “Mr. Fry, I really admire your work,” but all I got out was, “Mr. Fr–,” when I was nailed by a gong mallet right in the left temple. The next thing I know, I’m being wheeled across the stage on a small lorry to a waiting ambulance.
I had to drop out of the show, but that wasn’t the worst part. For weeks thereafter, everyone visiting me in the hospital kept making jokes about my unfortunate experience with “Fry and Lorry.”
The pun was so teeth-grindingly bad that it actually woke me up.
Comments
kellen
i love hugh laurie, especially in jeeves and wooster. i think the strangest place i’ve ever seen him is as annie lennox’s foppish date in her video for “walking on broken glass.” on a tangent, the object of annie’s obsession in the video is played by john malkovich.
dreams are fun.
dan
Damn, dude! That’s so weird! ‘Cause I was supposed to star in a show on the West end which was co-written and directed by Hugh Laurie. Here’s the really messed up part: at one rehearsal, I was backstage and I sneakily tried to eat one of Hugh’s “chips.” Well, in my haste to swallow before being caught, it got lodged in my throat.
Of course, you can imagine the jokes that come from choking on a bit of Laurie’s fry… Interminable.